30 – Braves – Only two more seasons til 2018! Great work trading Simmons and Miller!

29 – Reds – God we wish Joey Votto played on a better team. The rebuild has begun at least.

28 – Rockies – Hoping Jon Gray and Jeff Hoffman are the answers to their pitching prayers.

27 – Brewers – No more Adam Lind and no hope in the NL Central. Rebuilding offseason has lead led to some good moves selling high on Khris Davis and getting a decent haul for Jean Segura.

26 – Phillies – Phils finish ahead of the crap pack because they got a shit-load of prospects this offseason.

25 – Marlins – Young, talented but still the Marlins.

24 – Orioles – Shut up Showalter! O’s suck!

23 – Padres – A.J. Preller went off last offseason and now is selling off this offseason.

22 – Rays – As always, the Rays will have strong pitching but the offense of a seniors beer league team. Corey Dickerson is an interesting pick-up but his splits outside of Denver are not good.

21 – White Sox – How do Brett Lawie and Todd Frazier both play 3rd? Jokes a[south]side, even with an improved offense they’re probably not a safe bet in the AL Central but will probably have a better year.

20 -Twins – The team most likely to regress slightly, but have a chance to surprise everyone again with some wicked talent coming up (all hail Molitor!). Byron Buxton will hopefully finally show us what he can do in a full season.

19 – Mariners – Very active in the offseason but still the AL West’s 4th best team no matter how you put it. The Carson Smith for Wade Milley trade was some reactionary crap that will make Boston better. So boo! We also liked Lloyd McClendon for some reason. So x2 boo!

18 – A’s – As always the A’s are not seen as a contender but have the chance to surprise. The bullpen sucked last year and has a chance to be way way better.

17 – Angels – Pujols is hurt and the Angels offseason picks ups are underwhelming at best. This team may miss the playoffs by more than 1 game.

16 – D-backs – Greinke and Miller could make this team a contender but the NL West will be a fight to the finish. Dave Stewart is right who cares about prospects. Go for it! But man he paid way to much for Shelby Miller.

15 – Yankees – Starlin Castro was a great pick-up and the bullpen looks to be dominant. Question is how many games will the BP have a chance to finish. Sketchy SP and an aging middle of the line-up may not do it.

14 – Nationals – If Papelbon sticks around I would hate to be in this clubhouse. Lots of talent but mostly emotional obstacles in the way after their 2015 meltdown. Dusty Baker will see what he can do and winning does solve everything.

13 – Indians – Great pitching, reasonable offense. Why can’t the Indians win the Central? Probably because they are in Cleveland. Who knows? More likely a wild card threat.

12 – Rangers – A full year of Cole Hamels will add a lot to the 16′ Rangers. Yu Darvish will likely return along with a strong and diverse offense. If the rest of the pitching is at least decent this team will be in the picture come the end of September.

11 – Tigers – Praying this better looking bullpen will finally give them some stability. Zimmerman adds to a solid rotation and Justin Upton adds to a solid offense. God-forbid Miggy getting hurt again (it was Eds’ fault).

10 – Dodgers – Money can’t buy happiness, or apparently more than 2 wins in the playoffs. Corey Seager should be one of their best players and a legit ROY candidate. Still a strong team but their rivals to the north may have done enough to overtake them in a much more balanced division

9 –  Red Sox – With Price on the mound you can probably give Boston 10 more wins, but will it be enough? After Price the rotation is still thin and even with all their great young talent they still are burdened with Pablo and Hanley.

8 – Mets – The Mets were so much fun to watch in the second half last year. Great young pitching will once again have to carry this team but with the return of Cespedes for at least one full season the Mets may have an offense just barely good enough to consider them a possibly dominating team (when the line-up is healthy).

7 – Giants – Add solid pitching depth + good young offensive core = Winning. Also they will probably win because of that even year crap/spell they got going.

6 – Cardinals – Even with Heywerd and Lackey gone St. Louis still has the pieces to contend, as always. They are so consistent we are actually bored of them at this point. That being said it will be fun to watch them especially when they play Chicago and Pittsburgh (what great baseball it was last year when any of those teams matched up).

5 – Astros – Don’t care if they lost out on the division in the last few games. Astro’s will be at the top of the AL West again, for good. A solid young core with no bad salaries is an executives wet dream! Also Ken Giles is money!

4 – Pirates – The Buc’s once again lost in the wildcard game and I would bet you – however much Andrew McCutchen makes per AB – they will be right back there in 2016. As always the Pirates made smaller but solid moves to fill holes.

3 – Blue Jays – Smash, Smash, Smash! Full season of Tulo and Stroman could make 16 special! It will be up to the pitching to make it happen but this team could be better than the 93 wins they posted in last year.

2 – Royals – Especially with Gordon coming back they look like they could be just as good as 2015. AL Central could be very tight but if the Royals get off to a good start again maybe not. The computers hate them but they have earned our respect. One word: Chem·is·try

1 – Cubs – I dare you to say something bad about this team!